Friday, September 30, 2005


Blessings, children.

I just wanted to take a few moments to let you know that summer vacation is officially over, so I have moved from Castel Gandolfo to the papal apartment, but not without complications.

You see, I hadn’t moved completely into the apartment upon my elevation to the papacy because I was going to have it remodeled while I was staying at Castel Gandolfo. I returned Wednesday only to find my apartment riddled with empty pizza cartons and beer cans from the contractors. After cleaning up the mess was I inspected the work that had been done. I have to admit; in spite of being messy eaters, those Italians are master-craftsmen. They did a marvelous job updating my kitchen. It’s quite an improvement; don’t you think?



After getting that taken care of I called my brother George because he was going to help me finish moving stuff out of my old apartment. To my dismay, I couldn’t reach him on the line. I checked the number twice and it was correct.

I was quite concerned, because it’s not like George to miss an appointment and I could have really used the help. I wouldn’t feel comfortable asking somebody else to help, because that is such a big step in a friendship as we know from when Jerry Seinfeld was asked by Keith Hernandez to help him move.

So I figured I would just head over to George’s place on the way to my old apartment. I hooked up the trailer and set off.

I was relieved to see George’s car outside. I rang the bell, but there was no answer. I double-checked the address and it was definitely his place.

So I knocked really hard and held the doorbell down for a long time, but still no answer. I had to accept that this was one cross I was going to have to bear alone.

Then I went to my old apartment and visited with my lovely Chico for quite a while. I missed him so terribly. Then I started to load up my things.

Having all my effects secured in the trailer, I had one last thing to collect. Unfortunately, the wind picked up and I could have found myself in an embarrassing position, but as it turns out nobody noticed, so only you and I know. Shhhh!

The papal apartment finally feels like a home. Thank you, Lord.